4 Reasons Why Marriages Empower

All of us have at one point or time in life experienced the worst relationships can offer or know of someone whom has. It is to be expected since close to 70% of marriages fail. With such a high failure rate it is no wonder that many people have lost their enthusiasm for what was once a highly valued institution. Nowadays, relationships have deviated from their original purpose to more of a civil duty one must endure to fit into society, like paying taxes and voting. Or they are viewed as something that is not necessarily enjoyable but good for you like eating broccoli or going to the dentist. Enjoyment and enthusiasm about anything, let alone relationships, ultimately comes down to answering the age-old question “what’s in it for me?” or “how will I be impacted by the relationship”? Answering these questions will give you a better understanding of what you are getting into and better yet increase your enthusiasm and enjoyment for the process. With this in mind, here are four reasons why marriages empower:

1. Sense of Love.

Love and all of its applications are bonding practices. When one “falls in love” an emotional commitment takes place. If both parties feel the same then a bond is fulfilled. The bond will lead to a commitment under the institution of marriag

e. The marriage represents the combined effect of the bond much greater than the individual. Most think love is a result of the perceived happiness of the actions of their partner, but in reality it is about the perceived value of the relationship itself. In other words, when the wedding takes place, value is transferred from the individual to the greater organism that houses them. Situations challenge the placement of importance from the individual to the impact upon the marriage. This commitment challenges the superficial expressions of ego and selfishness, allowing the couple to achieve even higher states of love and enjoyment. Without the marriage, you are limited to rudimentary sensual fulfillments that fuel ego and selfishness leading to long-term loneliness and unhappiness. Marriage empowers by allowing people to experience a partnership of love, which leads to more long-term happiness than a relationship that is based only on fulfilling your sensual desires without commitment.

2. Sense of Worth/Value.

If a marriage is established based upon natal personalityand properly matched, then it will allow a sense of worth. This is not based upon common duties like cooking and cleaning even though they matter in a relationship as well. The relationship, like any organization, has its needs that are typically fulfilled through its duties and responsibilities. When the duties and responsibilities are matched with your natal personality, a sense of worth is generated. When this is not the case you will feel you are not a part of the success of the marriage, resulting in a low sense of worth and all of the emotional and mental issues that come with being taken for granted (a major reason behind infidelity). It is important to see the relationship as an organization, with a bottom line no different than any other corporation. The profit margin of a corporation is based upon getting talented people in the right positions. Marriage success is matching talents to its specific duties. Your sense of worth is greatly increased when your efforts and talents are tied to the needs of the relationship. The marriage empowers you by providing a sense of worth and value that is unparalleled to any other organization.

3. Sense of Impact.

A common problem in relationships results from the fear of not having an impact upon the behavior and change for the betterment of others. People will withhold resources, effort and love because of this fear. The marriage solves this problem because it brings people together within boundaries. It represents the sum of the combined efforts of its individuals. The boundaries of the marriage allow you to see how your decisions and behaviors impact the well being of your spouse. We are typically motivated to change for the better after experiencing the impact of decisions upon others. When there is no commitment, your decisions only impact you and limit the ability to change. The marriage allows the experience of impact that motivates change for the better, ideally, driving you and your spouse to improve and rise to higher states of success.

4. Sense of Accomplishment.

Why do people endure the known challenges and obstacles of any endeavor? Simply because of the notion that there is a return, a positive value at the end. Would you endure challenges and obstacles if there was no perceived reward e.g. money, fame etc.? People risk it all because of the potential reward. This is no different in relationships. It is unfortunate that nowadays we focus more on the risks e.g. divorce, alimony, child support, baby mama/daddy drama etc. than the rewards. Relationships are like any stock, mutual fund or savings account because they provide a return on an investment. In investing, you feel accomplished when you experience a modest return. In essence, the return justified the risk. In relationships, you feel accomplished when the marriage benefits from the success of spouses, the result of your so-called investments e.g. sacrifices, commitment of resources, enduring obstacles caused by their immaturity, times of poverty and so on. You would not throw money out of the window with the expectation of return and yield, yet people throw effort and resources into noncommittal relationships hoping for some return. People who experience long-term relationships all state without question they are better, faster, stronger, smarter, more geared for success as a result. Therefore, the reward outweighed the risk and challenge endured. Healthy marriages empower because they allow the reciprocation of the success of individuals e.g. career or business back to the original investor (spouse). It allows the experience of a sense of accomplishment based on the shared material success resulting from the “better you” created through the relationship.

Marriages are fulfilling, enjoyable and empowering. They take effort, work and dedication. Hopefully, understanding these areas of empowerment will increase your enthusiasm and commitment to this prestigious institution.

Ra Ama Hetep Amen has been a Synergy Coach for over 10 years. He has close to 15 years of business and sales experience with some of the top fortune 500 companies both in the pharmaceutical and financial services arena. He has also held the position of branch manager with one of the top financial services companies. He has over 10 years of experience and training in traditional African philosophy with an emphasis on ancient Egyptian principles and personality methodologies. He is married 19 years and counting and has three children. Catch up with him on Twitter at @RaAmaHetep, or Facebook at Ra Ama Hetep Amen